Mindfulness of Breathing – Journey 1 Week 8
This week’s meditation has been quite variable again. I find it a bit frustrating when I can’t get my mind to settle and the whole thing feels like hard work. I suppose I’d really like a perfect linear progression with each session an improvement on the last. Not much to ask, is it? Meanwhile, back in the ‘real’ world…
Morning sessions seem to have been better than evening ones this week. My mind seems a lot busier in the evening, with lots of thoughts about the day, which has been making it harder to settle and focus. I’ve a feeling that a month or so ago, it was the other way round with the morning session more difficult than the evening.
The background hum/hiss I mentioned last week has been more noticeable in some sessions, maybe when my mind is quieter, but mostly I’m not really aware of it.
I’ve noticed that my breathing seems to change after each daydream. By that, I mean that when my attention goes back to my breathing after getting carried away with thoughts, the breathing seems different in some way. Sometimes my breath becomes quieter or louder, slower or faster, shorter or longer. Maybe it has always done that but I’m becoming more aware of it now.
Another change in awareness happened part way through one session, when I suddenly perceived two very distinct streams of air, one in each nostril, instead of air just going in and out of my nose. This was very clear for a few minutes and then faded. Unfortunately, at the moment, any slight improvement in awareness like this doesn’t last.